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The true follower of Christ will not ask, "If I embrace this truth, what will it cost me?" Rather he will say, "This is truth. God help me to walk in it, let come what may!"
A. W. Tozer

Quips, Quotes & Fun Stuff

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Quips, Quotes & Fun Stuff

Post by Admin on Sun Sep 06, 2009 9:09 pm

First topic message reminder :

Do You have something Fun To Share?

Drop it in here for all to see! Like these top 10 Church Signs!


“The best vitamin for a Christian is B1.”
“Under same management for over 2000 years”
“Soul food served here.”
“Tithe if you love Jesus! Anyone can honk!”
“Don’t wait for the hearse to take you to church.”
“Beat the Christmas rush, come to church this Sunday!”
“Life has many choices, For Eternity, two. What’s yours?”
“Never give the devil a ride. He will always want to drive.”
“A man’s character is like a fence. It cannot be strengthened by whitewash.”
“Prevent truth decay. Brush up on your Bible.”


Last edited by Admin on Mon Aug 08, 2011 6:25 am; edited 3 times in total
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Re: Quips, Quotes & Fun Stuff

Post by Peter on Thu Feb 23, 2012 3:06 pm

HOW SMART IS YOUR RIGHT FOOT?


This is hysterical. You have to try this. It is absolutely true. I guess there are some things that the brain cannot handle.

You have to try this please, it takes 2 seconds. I could not believe this!!!

It is from an orthopedic surgeon................This will boggle your mind and it will keep you trying over and over again to see if you can outsmart your foot, but, you can't.
It's pre-programmed in your brain!

1). Without anyone watching you (they will think you're goofy) and while sitting at your desk in front of your computer, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.

2). Now, while doing this, draw the number '6' in the air with your right hand.
Your foot will change direction.

I told you so!!!

And there's nothing you can do about it! You and I both know how stupid it is, but before the day is done you are going to try it again, if you've not already done so.

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Re: Quips, Quotes & Fun Stuff

Post by Ray on Fri Mar 16, 2012 6:29 am

Great Story Scoop! Happy St. Pats To All!
Scoop wrote:
Happy St. Patricks Day All!


Irish Declare War on France:

The French President is sitting in his office when his telephone rings.

"Hallo, Mr. Sarkozy!" a heavily accented voice said. "This is Paddy down at
the Harp Pub in County Clare, Ireland. I am ringing to inform you that we
are officially declaring war on you!"
"Well, Paddy," Sarkozy replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is
your army?"

"Right now," says Paddy, after a moment's calculation, "there is meself, me
cousin Sean, me next door neighbour Seamus, and the entire darts team from the pub. That makes eight!"

Sarkozy paused. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 100,000 men in my army waiting to move on my command."
"Begoora!" says Paddy. "I'll have to ring you back."

Sure enough, the next day, Paddy calls again. "Mr. Sarkozy, the war is still
on. We have managed to get us some infantry equipment!"

"And what equipment would that be Paddy?" Sarkozy asks.

"Well, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Murphy's farm tractor."

Sarkozy sighs amused. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 6,000 tanks and
5,000 armored personnel carriers. Also, I have increased my army to 150,000 since we last spoke."
"Saints preserve us!" says Paddy. "I'll have to get back to you."

Sure enough, Paddy rings again the next day. "Mr. Sarkozy, the war is still
on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We have modified Jackie
McLaughlin's ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four
boys from the Shamrock Bar have joined us as well!"
Sarkozy was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. "I must tell
you, Paddy, that I have 100 bombers and 200 fighter planes. My military
bases are surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And
since we last spoke, I have increased my army to 200,000!"


"Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!" says Paddy, "I will have to ring you back."

Sure enough, Paddy calls again the next day. "Top O the mornin', Mr.
Sarkozy! I am sorry to inform you that we have had to call off the war."

"Really? I am sorry to hear that," says Sarkozy. "Why the sudden change of
heart?"

"Well," says Paddy, "we had a long chat over a few pints of Guinness, and we decided there is no way in Heaven we can feed 200,000 prisoners.
Happy St. Patricks Day All!
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Re: Quips, Quotes & Fun Stuff

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